The perils of online dating!

In order to save the face of the person this story refers to, I will refrain from revealing his identity here, but i was recently made aware of a friend's dapples in internet dating and cannot resist the urge to relate the story here.

You know the sites I refer to. Whether or not you've visited them at your lowest ebb in desperation for any form of solid partnership, or through casual curiosity or whatever, everyone is aware of them due to popups and website advertising.
It has always been a guideline for safe internet usage that not everyone is who they say they are. Well, my friend, who I shall call G for the purpose of this story, got a membership to one of these agencies and was soon chatting to several females. One such female caught his eye and boasted a profile picture of a slim, sexy blonde. Private chat sessions ensued and soon the pair were getting on like a house on fire.
After a few weeks of online chat and phone calls, G turned the subject round to a physical meeting. D (for date) regulalrly put this off until backed into a corner so a meet-up was arranged. G waited like a lemon for his date to turn up and, when it became clear he'd been stood up, he marched home to his computer and confronted her. She admitted that she wasn't all that she seemed so this prompted G to jump into his car and drive to his address. Arriving at the house, he saw a...rather large, silhouette against the closed curtained window. Gulping down his nerves at this twist, he knocked on the door and was met with a woman quite different to the picture she posted. Nevertheless, after the awkwardness of her lies subsided, he decided to take her out for a drink anyway but became nervous when she kept buying him doubles. Catching the eye of someone else in the bar, he managed to slip over and speak to her. She asked if he was seeing D and he said no. When he went to the toilet and returned however, it became interested who this new person was really interested in. She had her tongue shoved down D's throat.
G's surprises were not yet over though. When they came up for air, they noitced him and asked him quite a blatant question. 'Fancy a threesome?'
G felt it was time to back away from the situation, made his excuses, before realising he was too drunk to operate a vehicle, especially as several inches of snow had since fallen. Realising he was going to be forced to stay at D's he walked home with her, desperate to keep his senses alert. After refusing three subsequent offers to share her bed, he manaaged to fall asleep on the settee and woke at 4am. Snow cleared and feeling more sober, he tried to sneak out of the house, only to be met with pounding footsteps down the stairs and a chokeslam against the wall.
What took place in the next hour, my friend didn't go into detail but he did eventually emerge, after many pants of 'don't leave me' from D, a black eye and the realisation that she had made a voodoo doll of him in the night!

So I think I know one person at least who won't be tempted by the popups!