Thursday, June 29, 2006

Back in Business

I must admit, it's been a rather tetchy week, in a great deal of ways.
In a week where my state of emotions have fallen below the line of 'just not good' I have been faced once again with the very same decision I thought I had finalised a few weeks ago.
What this involved was abandoning my current lifestyle for an undetermined (potentially 3 to 4 months) for the sake of someone else.
I refuse to name my friend, nor the location or the cicumstances as to why the friend needed me to join them there for a long period of time, but, as it stood, I had decided that, yes, it would be necessary and acceptable to take a few months out from waht I was doing, to go to this location.
This would require me either to drop out of my last year of education (possibly temporarily) or ask about being able to catch up, sadly the first of which seemed most tempting to me. Also I would be left without a job, even though I had planned to ask for a temporary transfer to this location, I severely doubted that management would stretch to achieve this for me.
Neither of these were particularly worrying to me. The situation I was sacrificing them for far outweighed them in significance and overall importance.
So, I had my decision made and the weeks leading to the temporary relocation became days and I was forced to reconsider, in particular concerning one particular person that I would risk losing and hurting through it.
The choice, under pressure, was not a pleasant one to make, as someone would be losing out. But, I had to think logically and also was made, by two close friends who know who they are, that I can't afford, nor should I feel the need, to put my life on hold, and someone else's for that matter.
I'd like to give special thanks to Abbi as well, who was there for me a lot in the most stressful part of this decision and consequently the guilt stigmatised to it in the wake of my choice.

What have I learned from it? You can't keep everyone happy any of the time and it doesn't hurt to think of oneself once in a while.

2 comments:

Jennytc said...

the counselling would probably help you with that and help you not to feel guilty about it.

Wallo said...

Jennyta: I guess so xxx

Abbi/Carpenter: Thank you