Tuesday, October 31, 2006
Sunday, October 29, 2006
Well that's a bugger
The clever big shots at ITV have decided to close the doors on one of the only programmes on TV worth watching. They've axed Bad Girls after eight series despite the fact it gets nearly 6 million viewers tuning in each episode.
At least I don't have to be home for 9pm on Thursdays every summer now!
Wednesday, October 25, 2006
So it's come to this...
Well my pretty warped mind is playing more cruel tricks on me just to see where and when I will snap.
It's come to this...my self esteem at an all time low I feel unable to leave the house now and I can't face people and the negativity that exists within them.
Whether or not it's paranoia talking, I feel I can't relax in front of others, because of what they might be thinking about me.
Maybe I am more snappy than I used to be. Maybe I am more emotional and maybe I am too weak to deal with the crap hand life is giving me over this past year. Maybe I have lost too much weight but none of these judgements that people make about me are easy to digest because most of me doesn't want to face them.
And so my mind convinces me otherwise. My emotions are fine, everyone is overreacting, and I haven't lost nearly enough weight yet.
But in those moments where rationality kicks in and I see what's happening, it's damn scary and, if anything, acknowledging that there ar eproblems just makes the whole lot even worse.
So, finally I fully understand the phrase 'caught in vicious circle' but I would be more inclined to replace the word 'caught' with the word 'trapped'
That's the word that I would use to sum up my situation and my mentality these days. ANd it's a damn tricky trap to squeeze out of.
The week started with getting distant from the ones I love for fear of rejecting or annoying them. Then I couldnt go swimming with people I trust for fear of their judgements on my changing physical appearance. Now even leaving the house and facing people and going to work fills me with such dread and fear and I can't even put my finger on why.
I have 3 hours to pull myself together because it's too late to phone in sick. But it's a target that's a lot more daunting and difficult than most would imagine.
It's come to this...my self esteem at an all time low I feel unable to leave the house now and I can't face people and the negativity that exists within them.
Whether or not it's paranoia talking, I feel I can't relax in front of others, because of what they might be thinking about me.
Maybe I am more snappy than I used to be. Maybe I am more emotional and maybe I am too weak to deal with the crap hand life is giving me over this past year. Maybe I have lost too much weight but none of these judgements that people make about me are easy to digest because most of me doesn't want to face them.
And so my mind convinces me otherwise. My emotions are fine, everyone is overreacting, and I haven't lost nearly enough weight yet.
But in those moments where rationality kicks in and I see what's happening, it's damn scary and, if anything, acknowledging that there ar eproblems just makes the whole lot even worse.
So, finally I fully understand the phrase 'caught in vicious circle' but I would be more inclined to replace the word 'caught' with the word 'trapped'
That's the word that I would use to sum up my situation and my mentality these days. ANd it's a damn tricky trap to squeeze out of.
The week started with getting distant from the ones I love for fear of rejecting or annoying them. Then I couldnt go swimming with people I trust for fear of their judgements on my changing physical appearance. Now even leaving the house and facing people and going to work fills me with such dread and fear and I can't even put my finger on why.
I have 3 hours to pull myself together because it's too late to phone in sick. But it's a target that's a lot more daunting and difficult than most would imagine.
Thursday, October 19, 2006
Discuss!
I'm going to open an age old debate here, which is relevant to a recent and ongoing experience of mine.
How confidential should a medical exchange between a doctor and a patient who is under eighteen be?
There are laws in place that state that a doctor has the right to discuss things that a patient has said with a parent if he or she feels it is necessary.
In certain situations this could be seen as acceptable and justifiable, in others an invasion of a person's privacy.
Is there a line that should be drwan? An age boundary that should be changed? Or even a radical revamp of the whole system?
I'd be very interested to know what people think on it.
How confidential should a medical exchange between a doctor and a patient who is under eighteen be?
There are laws in place that state that a doctor has the right to discuss things that a patient has said with a parent if he or she feels it is necessary.
In certain situations this could be seen as acceptable and justifiable, in others an invasion of a person's privacy.
Is there a line that should be drwan? An age boundary that should be changed? Or even a radical revamp of the whole system?
I'd be very interested to know what people think on it.
Wednesday, October 18, 2006
*sigh* When will I ever learn?
Die hard, veteran readers of my blog (all two million of you ;)) will recall the closure of my first blog, The Diary Of Mr Slug when a bout of, self admittedly immature bitching fell into the hands of the very person it was about.
Awkward situations were created by this and the relationship between myself and the person concerned is arguably still, if even just a little, strained. Thus, I decided to end the life of my baby blog and 'Take Two' was born and I haven't looked back since.
Well, there was me swearing I won't make that mistake again.
Pffft fat chance of that. The school librarian, control freak she is, regularly invents her own rules and enforces them upon the people she doesn't like, depending on her mood. More unpredicatable than a menopausal, omnivorous, bisexual dinosaur, it's very hard to tell day by day whether the librarian will like you or loathe you. It's a gamble really.
I was bored one lesson so decided to take a wee bit of the piss. Just a little, you know me, I don't take things too far...:)
SO I made a list of library rules in a spoof that represents her unfair and unbelievable personality and desperation for power. While many of my readers won't understand them as much, not knowing the librarian, I've pasted them below.
List of Library Rules
-If you’re doing homework you must use white paper in the library and cream paper in the study room. Any swapping over will result in loss of library privileges
-Monday is romantic novel day. No other book genre may be read
-No purple stripey ties to be worn in the common room
-If your pen runs out, you will not get a study hour signed for the day.
-You may not whistle in the study room. Whistling is to be done in the to left corner of the library. And this must only be done between 2.15 and 2.45. At a noise level of 3-5. And not using your fingers. Mouth only. And only three students at a time. No exceptions. Disobeying this rule will result in you being sent to the common room
-We are bringing in more comfortable seating areas, bean bags and heating systems. Under no circumstances must these be used.
-You may eat in the common room but Thursday is no bagel day. Anyone caught eating a bagel in the common room on a Thursday will be sent to Mr Elvin
-You may not use the space bar on a computer keyboard more than twenty times in a minute. -Tracking devices are being installed to record how much space bars are used. Anyone caught exceeding the specified amount will be sent to the common room
-If you have a relative in hospital, they must not phone you with updates in the library. If this happens your phone will be confiscated
-You must choose only two friends to sit with each hour. Any other friends must be told that they are fat and sent to diet for the lesson. Failure to do this will result in you being banned from the library.
-Any books by an author with the surname beginning with C,D,F,L or S can only be read on a Wednesday. Any other times are not allowed. UNDER ANY CIRCUMSTANCES
-Any study that you do must be either an essay or a technical drawing for Systems and Control every Period 2 and 5. Everything else must be done periods 1,3 and 4
I printed off one copy. Just ONE. And somehow, a week later, I heard that a friend of mine was being accused of making a set of rules by the librarian. My heart dropped and obviously I wouldn't let my friend take the rap for it so I had to admit it. Huffily she shrugged and said: 'It doesn't matter, I wasn't even offended.'
But the stories I've heard since suggest that when she read them 'the roof was practically blown off'
Judging by her regular ways, I have no doubt that from now on she will mkae my school life as aggrivating and unpleasant as possible.
Oh well....bothered.
Awkward situations were created by this and the relationship between myself and the person concerned is arguably still, if even just a little, strained. Thus, I decided to end the life of my baby blog and 'Take Two' was born and I haven't looked back since.
Well, there was me swearing I won't make that mistake again.
Pffft fat chance of that. The school librarian, control freak she is, regularly invents her own rules and enforces them upon the people she doesn't like, depending on her mood. More unpredicatable than a menopausal, omnivorous, bisexual dinosaur, it's very hard to tell day by day whether the librarian will like you or loathe you. It's a gamble really.
I was bored one lesson so decided to take a wee bit of the piss. Just a little, you know me, I don't take things too far...:)
SO I made a list of library rules in a spoof that represents her unfair and unbelievable personality and desperation for power. While many of my readers won't understand them as much, not knowing the librarian, I've pasted them below.
List of Library Rules
-If you’re doing homework you must use white paper in the library and cream paper in the study room. Any swapping over will result in loss of library privileges
-Monday is romantic novel day. No other book genre may be read
-No purple stripey ties to be worn in the common room
-If your pen runs out, you will not get a study hour signed for the day.
-You may not whistle in the study room. Whistling is to be done in the to left corner of the library. And this must only be done between 2.15 and 2.45. At a noise level of 3-5. And not using your fingers. Mouth only. And only three students at a time. No exceptions. Disobeying this rule will result in you being sent to the common room
-We are bringing in more comfortable seating areas, bean bags and heating systems. Under no circumstances must these be used.
-You may eat in the common room but Thursday is no bagel day. Anyone caught eating a bagel in the common room on a Thursday will be sent to Mr Elvin
-You may not use the space bar on a computer keyboard more than twenty times in a minute. -Tracking devices are being installed to record how much space bars are used. Anyone caught exceeding the specified amount will be sent to the common room
-If you have a relative in hospital, they must not phone you with updates in the library. If this happens your phone will be confiscated
-You must choose only two friends to sit with each hour. Any other friends must be told that they are fat and sent to diet for the lesson. Failure to do this will result in you being banned from the library.
-Any books by an author with the surname beginning with C,D,F,L or S can only be read on a Wednesday. Any other times are not allowed. UNDER ANY CIRCUMSTANCES
-Any study that you do must be either an essay or a technical drawing for Systems and Control every Period 2 and 5. Everything else must be done periods 1,3 and 4
I printed off one copy. Just ONE. And somehow, a week later, I heard that a friend of mine was being accused of making a set of rules by the librarian. My heart dropped and obviously I wouldn't let my friend take the rap for it so I had to admit it. Huffily she shrugged and said: 'It doesn't matter, I wasn't even offended.'
But the stories I've heard since suggest that when she read them 'the roof was practically blown off'
Judging by her regular ways, I have no doubt that from now on she will mkae my school life as aggrivating and unpleasant as possible.
Oh well....bothered.
Tuesday, October 17, 2006
Blogger's Block
So what do you write about when everything that is on your mind is impossible to convey?
My recent bout of blogger's block is more a restriction from being able to speak of things going on than a 'blank' of the mind.
It must be said that at this moment in time I'd love nothing more than to be able to blank my mind, but hey.
So excuse me for my continuing periods of silence.
That meme on gemmak's blog is looking to be an ideal solution to the blank canvas of my blog in the near future.
:)
My recent bout of blogger's block is more a restriction from being able to speak of things going on than a 'blank' of the mind.
It must be said that at this moment in time I'd love nothing more than to be able to blank my mind, but hey.
So excuse me for my continuing periods of silence.
That meme on gemmak's blog is looking to be an ideal solution to the blank canvas of my blog in the near future.
:)
Tuesday, October 10, 2006
Sorry for the negligence
I am aware that lately upates to this blog have been scarce. Due to certain events and situations cropping up here and there, I have been unable to do much in terms of blogging so to those who read, apologies and also those blogs I normally comment on, I haven't forgotten you exist!
I'm hoping that the 'hurdles' are resolved soon and that service can be resumed as soon as possible :)
I'm hoping that the 'hurdles' are resolved soon and that service can be resumed as soon as possible :)
Monday, October 02, 2006
Season Seventeen: Spoilers
Edition 161:
There's an atmosphere of euphoria in the village: Ms Poulter has been shot! And PC Sight realises pretty quickly that his investigation will be a hard one as there is no shortage of suspects. As the superbitch is rushed to hospital, will she live to tell the tale of who pulled the trigger?
Meanwhile, the residents' curiosity builds as the mansion is finally sold and a well spoken lady moves in complete with her children.
While they may not be able to afford the luxury Hawaiin cruise that they desired, Mark and Rebecca decide for a seaside holiday instead.
Following her horror at Halloween, Ms Simpson is plagued by nightmares of evil Dr Cox and psychopath Lillie. And she is also trapped by a real life villain as Greg continues his callous manipulation. Is there any escape for the long suffering Ms Simpson?
Edition 162:
Jade is aggrivated as Mark and Rebecca excitedly plan their upcoming holiday and plans her next sabotage.
Mary organises a party to get to know the villagers a lot better, especially as her pompous children make a bad impression in the neighbourhood.
Ms Simpson collapses after more terrifying visions so Greg, annoyed that this means he will be without sex for the night, visits a prostitute
PC Sight's investigations continue as he interroagtes Kate over Ms Poulter's shooting.
Edition 163:
Callie's hot headed interview with the police leaves PC Sight wondering if she is to blame for Ms Poulter's shooting.
There is drama at Mary's party as her mother Margaret makes an unwelcome arrival and causes a stir
Ms Simpson is referred to a psychologist where she promptly makes a friend.
Jade works her manipulative charm on Rebecca and secures a place on her holiday
A drunk Mr Stanton admits he hopes Ms Poulter dies, leaving Russo with the perfect ammunition for revenge
Edition 164:
Mr Stanton is arrested for Ms Poulter's shooting, much to his dismay and paula is horrified when she realises it is due to Russo's input.
Dom hears that Jade has been invited on Mark's holiday with Rebecca and wonders why he can't go.
Noto returns and apologies to Luco and Rarin for his behaviour. But is he sincere?
Maragaret's influence on Mary and her family becomes clear.
Greg is angered that Ms Simpson is spending so much time with Diane
Edition 165:
Diane confesses to Ms Simpson that she has cancer and therefore only a limited number of weeks to live.
Jade sprays some perfume onto Mark's coat and watches the sparks fly when Rebecca smells it
Mary's rich husband arrives in Panda Stripe Village and Margaret is soon butterig him up
Ms Poulter is discharged from hospital and Mr Stanton's hopes are dashed when it becomes clear she didn't see who her shooter was.
Linford and Nancy have a dramatic fallout when he suspects that she shot Ms Poulter
Edition 166:
Mark and Rebecca head off on their seaside holiday accompanied by scheming Jade and hapless Dom and Noto.
Jade ensures that Mark and Rebecca get little time alone together while Noto and Dom's light hearted fun boils over into a violent confrontation when the subject of Rarin arises.
Mark gets continually frustrated that Jade has pulled the wool over Rebecca's eyes and, as darkness falls and heavy clouds form in the sky, danger lurks around the corner as a catastrophic storm takes hold...
Edition 167:
Ms Simpson and Diane decide to live their last moments to the fullest, but evil Greg has other ideas. Feeling he is losing his hold over Ms Simpson he decides to take Diane's fate in his own hands and bring her death forward a few weeks. As a heartbroken Ms Simpson finds her close friend's body, will she realise that she has been murdered?
And Greg isn't the only villager with murder in mind as Margaret poisons Robert's meal and Mark tries to convince Rebecca that Jade tried to kill him during the storm.
Rarin has had enough of the constant confrontations and demands that Dom moves away with her. Also planning a new life are Linford and Nancy, but Alyssa is devastated that she has to move away.
Edition 168:
Charmaine tries to split up Linford and Nancy in a desperate bid to keep Alyssa in the village.
Greg loses his cool when Ms Simpson has more visions in the wake of Diane's death and he pushes her down the stairs.
Jade's true intentions dawn on Rebecca as she finally wises to the meddling. But Jade won't give up so easily...
Margaret makes a pass at Robert and the consequent showdown leaves a dead body in the manor. Who has breathed their last?
Edition 169:
Rebecca confronts Jade over her bahaviour and a showdown culminates in a violent brawl betwene the pair. As Jade realises her game is up, Rebecca throws her out into the streets. But is it really the last she has seen of her nasty lodger?
Charmaine and Alyssa's 'final sleepover' ends in a grim horror as Greg exposes his true colours to his devastated daughter.
In the wake of Robert's death, the Manor family are richer than ever but ary is suspicious of Margaret's assistance in Robert's departure.
Edition 170
Charmaine is devastated in the wake of greg's attack on Alyssa and Ms Simpson finally realises that her fiance murdered her best friend. Time is running out for Greg and a furious Linford is after his blood. As the net closes in, Greg takes his last stand against his enemies, and not everyone will make it through the night alive...
There's an atmosphere of euphoria in the village: Ms Poulter has been shot! And PC Sight realises pretty quickly that his investigation will be a hard one as there is no shortage of suspects. As the superbitch is rushed to hospital, will she live to tell the tale of who pulled the trigger?
Meanwhile, the residents' curiosity builds as the mansion is finally sold and a well spoken lady moves in complete with her children.
While they may not be able to afford the luxury Hawaiin cruise that they desired, Mark and Rebecca decide for a seaside holiday instead.
Following her horror at Halloween, Ms Simpson is plagued by nightmares of evil Dr Cox and psychopath Lillie. And she is also trapped by a real life villain as Greg continues his callous manipulation. Is there any escape for the long suffering Ms Simpson?
Edition 162:
Jade is aggrivated as Mark and Rebecca excitedly plan their upcoming holiday and plans her next sabotage.
Mary organises a party to get to know the villagers a lot better, especially as her pompous children make a bad impression in the neighbourhood.
Ms Simpson collapses after more terrifying visions so Greg, annoyed that this means he will be without sex for the night, visits a prostitute
PC Sight's investigations continue as he interroagtes Kate over Ms Poulter's shooting.
Edition 163:
Callie's hot headed interview with the police leaves PC Sight wondering if she is to blame for Ms Poulter's shooting.
There is drama at Mary's party as her mother Margaret makes an unwelcome arrival and causes a stir
Ms Simpson is referred to a psychologist where she promptly makes a friend.
Jade works her manipulative charm on Rebecca and secures a place on her holiday
A drunk Mr Stanton admits he hopes Ms Poulter dies, leaving Russo with the perfect ammunition for revenge
Edition 164:
Mr Stanton is arrested for Ms Poulter's shooting, much to his dismay and paula is horrified when she realises it is due to Russo's input.
Dom hears that Jade has been invited on Mark's holiday with Rebecca and wonders why he can't go.
Noto returns and apologies to Luco and Rarin for his behaviour. But is he sincere?
Maragaret's influence on Mary and her family becomes clear.
Greg is angered that Ms Simpson is spending so much time with Diane
Edition 165:
Diane confesses to Ms Simpson that she has cancer and therefore only a limited number of weeks to live.
Jade sprays some perfume onto Mark's coat and watches the sparks fly when Rebecca smells it
Mary's rich husband arrives in Panda Stripe Village and Margaret is soon butterig him up
Ms Poulter is discharged from hospital and Mr Stanton's hopes are dashed when it becomes clear she didn't see who her shooter was.
Linford and Nancy have a dramatic fallout when he suspects that she shot Ms Poulter
Edition 166:
Mark and Rebecca head off on their seaside holiday accompanied by scheming Jade and hapless Dom and Noto.
Jade ensures that Mark and Rebecca get little time alone together while Noto and Dom's light hearted fun boils over into a violent confrontation when the subject of Rarin arises.
Mark gets continually frustrated that Jade has pulled the wool over Rebecca's eyes and, as darkness falls and heavy clouds form in the sky, danger lurks around the corner as a catastrophic storm takes hold...
Edition 167:
Ms Simpson and Diane decide to live their last moments to the fullest, but evil Greg has other ideas. Feeling he is losing his hold over Ms Simpson he decides to take Diane's fate in his own hands and bring her death forward a few weeks. As a heartbroken Ms Simpson finds her close friend's body, will she realise that she has been murdered?
And Greg isn't the only villager with murder in mind as Margaret poisons Robert's meal and Mark tries to convince Rebecca that Jade tried to kill him during the storm.
Rarin has had enough of the constant confrontations and demands that Dom moves away with her. Also planning a new life are Linford and Nancy, but Alyssa is devastated that she has to move away.
Edition 168:
Charmaine tries to split up Linford and Nancy in a desperate bid to keep Alyssa in the village.
Greg loses his cool when Ms Simpson has more visions in the wake of Diane's death and he pushes her down the stairs.
Jade's true intentions dawn on Rebecca as she finally wises to the meddling. But Jade won't give up so easily...
Margaret makes a pass at Robert and the consequent showdown leaves a dead body in the manor. Who has breathed their last?
Edition 169:
Rebecca confronts Jade over her bahaviour and a showdown culminates in a violent brawl betwene the pair. As Jade realises her game is up, Rebecca throws her out into the streets. But is it really the last she has seen of her nasty lodger?
Charmaine and Alyssa's 'final sleepover' ends in a grim horror as Greg exposes his true colours to his devastated daughter.
In the wake of Robert's death, the Manor family are richer than ever but ary is suspicious of Margaret's assistance in Robert's departure.
Edition 170
Charmaine is devastated in the wake of greg's attack on Alyssa and Ms Simpson finally realises that her fiance murdered her best friend. Time is running out for Greg and a furious Linford is after his blood. As the net closes in, Greg takes his last stand against his enemies, and not everyone will make it through the night alive...
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