I really am in the wrong job.

After another strenuous day twisting myself to satisfy the continuously absurd demands of the general public I feel there are a few thinks I must straighten out to the customer. The reason I am doing so here is because if the opportuniy/temptation arose when I really wanted to say it, I would no doubt lose my job.

Firstly...the phrase you use when you approach me at my checkout that takes the form of 'I thought I'd come to you because you look bored' really doesn't wash with me. I don't know what kind of life you think I lead but seeing someone approaching me with a trolley full of barcodes to scan and items to pack really doesn't excite me and isn't a renowned remedy for boredom.
And what would you do if you saw me looking happy at my checkout? You'd walk on by I presume?

And also when you're the first customer in the store on a Sunday morning, having waited outside locked doors for fifteen minutes and you jovially approach me and joke about your own desperation to buy DIY goods...I don't find you funny. I still find you sad and feel you are an irritation. Nothing you can possibly say or do will change my mind. If you wait outside a store for it to open the you need a life. Period.

When you approach me for a refund and are in the depths of despair that a replacement product happens to be out of stock, your wailing and tantrums will not allow me to materialise your desired goods out of thin air. And, this may surprise you but your constant complaints about how hard your life has become as a result of this 'out of stock' crisis will not induce any sympathy on my part. Quite the opposite in fact. It will make me resent you for making an issue out of something so trivial when other people are going through much worse things. And when the person who has the power to solve your issue resents you, you may be out of luck if you're hoping for your item in the near future.

I also find it absurd that some of you can walk into a store while you have a nauseating aroma surrounding you. Is personal hygeine lost on you? I do not want to have to smell a sewer full of decomposing horses that have been eating rotten brussel sprouts when I come to serve you. Also, if I'm in close enough proximity to be able to feel your breath then it's courteous of you to ensure you arrive having brushed your teeth or slushed some mouthwash about. The 'safety at work' guidelines cover being knocked out by bad breath as well, in my book. Please, if you're on the way to this shop, take a minor detour to the newsagents and invest in some breath mints and deodrant.

If I am talking to someone in the shop, chances are we are conducting a conversation of some kind. So it is not polite or even acceptable for you to amble over and interrupt with your own question. The fact that I am engaging in an exchange in words with another person and holding eye contact usually means I am already busy serving someone. You wouldn't interrupt a conversation at home or on the street. Becoming the customer who is always right doesn't give you the added benefit of being inpolite.
Oh and on the same vain...if I am carrying packs of laminate flooring or a heavy fireplace, I am obviously not able to direct you to an aisle at this point. You may have to wait.

And you may think that giving me the right change is doing me a favour but let's weigh the situation up shall we? I have a queue which I am trying to shorten. You open your purse and empty a heap of coppers onto the desk. You proceed to count them all out individually and upon doing so, pass me the pile on your hand which I then have to recount for myself. After standing waiting, then counting a pile of change I then have to deposit each coin into it's respective tray in the till, one by one.
Please...just pass me a fiver. My till has plenty of change. I can give you it. Thanks for the lovely thought and all...but it doesn't help. And if you're so eager to get rid of your change stop being so damned tight and put it in a charity box!

Technology is advanced...but my till isn't magic. Sometimes it is possible to expect just a bit too much. Telling me a vague description of an item you want does not give me the ability to 'find it on my till' And if my till doesn't have an ability...no amount of begging from you will inspire me to travel to head office and re-program all of the tills to satisy you. While you expect too much of these tills, you then go to the other extreme when a disagreeable price comes up. 'The till must be wrong' You expect it to find articles, know all of your details because you happened to make a purchase four years ago but it can't scan an item properly? Do make up your mind.

And really, is it totally necessary to drift in two minutes before closing to place a complex order you have had all day to do? It may not seem like it but we have a life outside our work uniform and finishing our shift at the designated time is preferable to additional minutes seeing to your needs and consequent ingratitude. We do actually have homes and shockingly prefer them to our workplace. Just a thought. Maybe give it some consideration.

And while you're in the consideration mode, think about this. For what possible reason would I LIKE to carry out a long refund, order huge amounts for delivery or phone around other stores to find a certain item. Asking me if I would LIKE to do it will get you a polite response...but is there really much sense in the question? Hey it's my job so I'll do it for you...but it certainly isn't something I would like to do. Funnily enough I don't get a warm glow in my heart and allow my bladder to give way in sheer excitement when I see you approaching, receipt in hand with a trolley full of unwanted items. So no I wouldn't really like to. It's tedious, it's an inconvenience. And implying that you should get special treatment from me because you are a regular spender won't fetch much success. I'm a 17 year old student in a part time role. I don't care about the shop's takings. If I had the choice of licking your arse and being your slave or you not coming to the store at all I know which it'd be.

And here's my final suggestion...perhaps you shouldn't come to me when you shop at the store I work in. Because I seem to have pretty high standards for you to meet as my ideal customer ;)

Don't hold your breath...

So...the step bastard has decided that he is giving up on alcohol. He's trained his single, deformed brain cell which occupies the dense space inside of his mis-shapen head to realise that alcohol and his unwelcome habit of being a control freak may be connected in some not so distant way.

Having established this quite marvellous breakthrough in his own personal, warped psychology, he made the declaration that alcohol would vacate his lifestyle. Simple as that. Not another drop of the stuff.

Yeah right

Taking his 'becoming a wanker' fuel from him is like taking a fish out of water. The withdrawal symptoms are dangerous enough on an intelligent being so goodness knows what effects they will have on him. I'd be willing to bet that his attitude wouldn't improve.
Hey, here's a thought. Maybe it's not all the alcohol's fault. Maybe you act like a complete selfish pratt all the time because...well, you ARE a complete selfish pratt?
Just a thought, what would I know?

Well whatever happens I can't see the household being freed from his controlling clutches quite yet.
He plans to go to the pub tomorrow.
Orange juice all round is it?

Not Likely.

I swear they just get stupider

Okay so my first day in my new job. Having had a quick ten minute training, I was told that I was on my own with it for four days while the other person who does it had a long weekend. Great.
So there I was, piles of paperwork and not a clue how to do it. I managed to crash two computers in the process of printing, I went on a wild goose chase to find some stock that someone had already done but hey I eventually got it all worked out through my amazing powers of initiative.
Pfffft but hey it resembles completion in some form.
So, half an hour before the end of my shift and after a stressful day i've managed to get it all done when along comes a customer and orders thousands of pounds worth of goods. I go through the order form, we then go through a further form to apply for a card, put it through the till, exchange receipts and she goes on her way. As she goes to exit she turns around and says 'I hope you don't presume that the address I've given is the delivery address, as I don't live there anymore'
Errr what!?
'Yes and that phone number is my old one so you may struggle to get a hold of me.' You think!?
'Would it help if I gave you my current address and phone number?'
It WOULD have helped when I was doing the order. I mean, of all the stupid things...the dozy cow doesn't even seem to know where she lives!
Asking for an address isn't the most difficult of things and excuse me for being stupid enough to presume that the address she gave me was the correct one.
Off she ambled, blissfully unaware that she'd open a whole new can of worms and excessive paperwork for me to do before I could go home.
When I eventually got all orders sorted, reordered, refunded and resold I was well over half an hour past my finishing time.

Some people are just beyond me at times.

What a let down

It's always quite a hurt when you turn to people you expect will be there for you when you need them only to be brought back down to earth with a crash.
Once in a lifetime I would deem harsh enough. It's quite a blow that leaves you stunned for someone to offer no support when it is someone you always thought you could rely on for it.
but twice in the space of a week?

It just lets me know who I can trust and class as a friend.
Well, maybe not. Moreso who I CAN'T.
And when one is your mother and the other your girlfriend, you know you're not doing well.

Buggering shit!!!

The Fruit Bowl: Season Sixteen Spoilers.

Season Sixteen kicks off next week. Here are the details of what's to come. Again, there are ten series in this season but there is also a Halloween special between Season Sixteen and Season Seventeen.

Also don't forget to vote in the Season Fifteen awards.

Edition 151:
We pick up where we left off and Paula is in a dilemma as she has two suitors vying for her attention. Will she go ahead with her wedding to Russo or abandon her plans in favour of old flame Mr Stanton?
In the wake of Sheena's botched attack on Ms Poulter, Alyssa is in hospital and only Mark knows the truth about what happened. Ms Poulter uses her unique brand of persuasion to ensure Alyssa doesn't find out what went on...
Meanwhile, shockwaves reverberate round the village as Rarin and Dom announce their engagement whereas locals berate one time friend Stella for protecting Colin.

Edition 152:
Rebecca's arrival on the scene has left Mark in a daze. As she moves in with him, how is he going to break the news that he is already spoken for to lovelorn Alyssa?
When Sheena relates her suspicions about Alyssa's injuries to Nancy, it's not long before the raging mother is confronting Ms Poulter. But has she bitten off more than she can chew?
Alyssa gets the shock of her life when she witnesses Greg hit Siobhan. Can Greg silence the youngster to stop his true colours being exposed?
Meanwhile, Mr Stanton confides in Sheena that he thinks Ms Poulter was resonsible for his split with Paula while Stella is left in a bad state when a brick thrown through her window collides with her.

Edition 153:
Ms poulter has a new empire as she uses the remainder of Boonp's money to buy the school and Kate isn't happy to find herself demoted.
Mark is playing with fire trying to keep Alyssa and Rebecca away for eachother. How long can he lead a double life?
Sheena starts to play detective and enlists Linford's help to discover the truth about the night of Mr Stanton and Paula's split.
Elsewhere, Stella realises she has no friends left while Dom punches Luco during a heated argument.

Edition 154:
The investigations continue into the split of Mr Stanton and Paula and when Ms Poulter gets wind of it she is furious to learn that Sheena has been meddling...
Rarin fights back at Noto saying she doesn't care if she and Dom have to marry alone and Mark has to break some news to Alyssa, leaving her to flee in tears to the woods. But, as she crosses the path of convicted pervert Colin, has she walked straight into danger?
And Charles finds himself sacked as Ms poulter makes herself at home in the school.

Edition 155:
Alyssa manages to escape crazed Colin's clutches and as Stella realises that her son will never change she lashes out leading to a scuffle that has fatal results...who ends up dead?
There are two weddings at risk as Dom admits that the negative feelings are getting to him and CHarles has to tell Callie that, now he has no job, they can't afford a wedding.
And, as Ms Simpson and Ms Poulter comes to blows, Mr Stanton's investigation comes to fruition...he finally realises what Ms Poulter did the night of his split with Paula

Edition 156:
Ms Poulter is desperate for revenge and fabricates photos of her and Linford together, But, when Alyssa refuses to plant them for her she lashes out an could be about to lose the only friend she had left.
Rarin and Dom make a decision and Mr Stanton tells Paula the truth about their split...but is it too late to salvage their relationship?
Rebecca invites her friend Jade to stay with them and it soon emerges that three is a crowd. And one resident is about to see the venemous side to jade's personality...
Meanwhile, Ms poulter oversees maintenance on the school and Callie climbs the scaffolding to confront her. When the fight turns violent, Callie is soon regretting her actions as she is sent plummeting from the top...

Edition 157:
Mark tells Jade to leave when he spots her stealing from Rebecca's purse, but she turns the tables and he is soon in the frame. How will Rebecca react?
Ms poulter takes delight in admitting to Mr Stanton that she framed him for sleeping with Nancy and he lashes out in full view of the public.
And it's not the only framing that Ms poulter is doing as she accuses Kate of ogling girls getting changed for PE. Will her claims land an innocent Kate into hot water?
And Noto finds himself attracted to newcomer Jade...but is he about to get his fingers burnt?

Edition 158:
Following his heartache at the hands of Jade, Noto turns his rage on Rarin and Dom and refuses to ever bury the hatchet even though Luco has stopped them from leaving.
Jade resorts to blackmail in exchange for getting Mark out of hot water with Rebecca...but does she have a hidden agenda?
Ms poulter is on her cruellest form as she uses threats of violence to get Alyssa to back up her claims against Kate.
Meanwhile, Ms Simpson gets a taste of greg's true colours and Paula loses her temper and punches Ms Poulter.

Edition 159:
Dom and Rarin prepare to tie the knot but, after a run in with the manipulative Jade, Noto turns up determined to ruin the day...how far will he go?
Ms poulter is smug as everything seems to be going her way...but how long before her luck runs out?
Rebecca and Mark prepare to book a holiday but are concerned when they realise they don't have the funds to afford one. While Rebecca is convinced they just miscalculated, Mark's suspicions turn to Jade.
And Ms Simspon becomes trapped by Greg as she forgives him, leaving him in control of yet another life.

Edition 160:
After excessive run ins with the village, Ms poulter is left shaken but is still firmly in control of the situation.
That is until a gun is pulled and she is shot in the dead of the night. As she lies bleeding to death in the street, will she survive the vengeful attack?
And who pulled the trigger?

Edition 161: (Halloween Special)
As a visitor passes through the village there is a grim atmosphere in the air and as night falls, a series of supernatural events throw the locals into chaos.
Ghostly visits from past faces may seem harmless, but danger lurks around every corner and not everyone will survive the night of horror that awaits...

I am sick of my future being laid out for me by other people.
The disappointment of sixth form turning out to be nothing more than an open prison has put me off education in the most sourest of fashions and the prospect of further studies right now just don't appeal to me in any shape of form.
Perhaps the beckon of a university life might deliver the promised independance that sixth form has thus far failed to but, at this moment in time, all it's enough to think about getting this last dreaded year of school out of the way.
It's quite sad. Ever since I can remember, I have been studious and despite years of bullying and social torment at school I only managed to shake off and turn around a couple of years back, I was enthusiastic about school.
Every piece of homework, every bit of effort, I did it all and relished it. School was the way forward and now, in the last year that I should be dreading because it means I will be losing something that was part of me for a long time has become something I want over with just so I can get rid of school.
Sixth form has turned my stomach to sickness where education is concerned. it has made me not give a damn. it's results day this week. But I don't know the date, nor do I care about my impending grades.
Everyone around me is forever putting pressure on me to get high grades, go to university and be a financial success yet nobody seems to care what I actually want to do. University, due to my loss of reliance on the education system has become a prospect that is no longer essential or even necessary to me.
This is my expected path because I'm 'bright'
So all those years of studying and working hard has effectively left me trapped.
Hey, now I know why it was all worth it...

The right decision?

For a few days it has been lingering in my mind that, for the sake of us both, based on my 'issues' with stress that I should reject an important person from my life.
Tonight, I made my final decision on the matter and told J that I feel we should just be friends.
In the past I have had to do this because I didn't like the person. this time I am doing it because I am afraid of liking this person too much.
I've been down the road of falling for someone and being heartbroken...I am not doing that again.

What I'm afraid of now is that I have just done that very thing to someone else, someone that despite my reasons for doing it, I still care for very much.

Did I do the right thing?

I should learn to hold my temper...

...because now, thanks to my clenched fist, I now need a new printer!
BAH!

Time to oneself

I had the rare occurence of a weekend off this week and took advantage of the spare time to chill out and relax.
I went out to spend some time with J and stayed with her for the weekend. From Friday night to Monday morning it was a relief to be able to enjoy some time for me and her, some time to relax, some time to have a laugh and ignore the pressures of home life, work and illness among other things which have been pressing on me lately.
There wasn't a particular flurry of activity but it didn't matter, we spent a day doing the shops (albeit mostly the girly ones) in newcastle with a few friends and we slobbed out in front of lame, cheesy but oddly satisfying films. On the Sunday, what was meant to be a short walk between just myself and her escalated into a ten mile trek through the pouring rain and we ended up home, soaked to the skin, covered in muck and scrapes and I learned the lesson that I should always check the weather forecast thoroughly before wearing a white t-shirt.
Aside from a brief strike of illness, it was a carefree weekend, something which I've needed for a long time and something which has done me the world of good.

When will it end?

So another weekend packed to the brim of sickness and feeling 'not too goodery'
A particularly harsh spell of queasiness struck and I found myself dashing like a maniac too and from the toilet to empty what appeared to be the vast contents of my stomach and possibly the rest of my body into the toilets at work in between serving unpleasant ladies and gentlemen of the public.
My painful spells of vomiting culminated in a short period of passing out, something I have not experienced for quite some time.
In the middle of a 46 hour week, it is not a pleasant prospect to be feeling ill to this degree and I hope it manages to hold itself off at least for the time being when I can give it more of my attention and focus.
Hey I have a weekend holiday coming up...perhaps it can ruin that?
I'll pen it in my diary.